Finding Space Podcast

A podcast where UC Berkeley students, educators, and staff from the disability community tell their stories and call the campus community in on acts of advocacy and disability justice. 


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RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Once I moved into the hallway, I immediately realized that I did not have a way out. It was probably the most terrifying moment outside of a hospital in my life, I'll say. And I remember just hearing the alarms blare and blare and blare. And it wasn't just the threat to my physical safety. It was the mental aspect of seeing your peers evacuate without you, that feeling of being left behind. TRACIE ALLEN: You're listening to Finding Space, a podcast where UC Berkeley students, educators, and staff from the disability community tell their stories and call the campus community in on acts of advocacy and disability justice. Hi, everyone. I'm Tracie Allen. I'm the Access and Innovation Strategist at Research, Teaching, and Learning. I'm so glad you're here. Finding Space is a project close to my heart, created to amplify disability justice and reimagine what access, equity, and belonging can look like in higher ed. Last episode, we explored leading culture from where you are and the power of collective care. Today, we continue that conversation with alum Ryan Manriquez. That community support is collective care in action, shaped by everyday choices, not just policy. My name is Tracie Allen, she/her pronouns. I am the Access and Innovation Strategist at the Center for Teaching and Learning at UC Berkeley. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Hey there. My name is Ryan Manriquez. I use he/they pronouns. I'm a recent graduate of UC Berkeley. I just got my master's in public policy degree from the Goldman School, right up the hill. And I'm a physically disabled student. I live with spinal muscular atrophy, which is a rare neuromuscular disease. And I'm independently using a power wheelchair right now. And I think my disability journey living with a rare disease has really transformed over the last decade. And it's a direct result of so many things that are interconnected with the university. My rare disease did not have a treatment until 2017. There was a breakthrough with the treatment called nusinersen, or Spinraza is the label name. But that was developed through NIH research. My advocacy and academia journey didn't start here at the Goldman School. It actually started up the road at the University Farm, otherwise known as UC Davis, where, in 2020, that was the year that Crip Camp came out. And I got to learn more about the history of what the epicenter of the disability rights movement was in Berkeley, California, and on the university campus. And that made me think about a lot of the work that we were trying to and create the community that we were trying to build. So I grew up in a town of about 30,000 people, and I was the only physically disabled student in a high school of over 2,000 students. TRACIE ALLEN: Wow. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: And back then, I did not have any compass for disability history, disability identity, or the community that I was a part of. And it wasn't until I got to Davis that I started learning more. That was a big theme during my time there and still is today, is the theme of representation. But when we're talking about disability justice, disability justice, principle number two of leadership by those most impacted. And during that time, I had peers come to me, colleagues in the Senate saying, hey, Ryan, we think you'd be a great candidate to run for ASUCD president, for student body president. And my jaw hit the floor. And I doubted myself quite a lot. We had a lot of imposter syndrome. I said, how do you think I could accurately represent 30,000 students when I just got here six months ago? I was a transfer student. But then that theme of representation came crawling back in the back of my mind. Who better to represent students during that time of the pandemic than someone who's immunocompromised themselves? But I knew after undergrad that I still needed that community, and I still had more in the tank in terms of advocacy work to do. I remember writing in my application to the Goldman School that I didn't just want to experience the rich history of disability rights, but I wanted to contribute to it. And following that, I was accepted. And it was a no-brainer that I was going to come to this campus to contribute to that history. TRACIE ALLEN: I love that. I remember when you invited me to the class, the lecture for Emily Nusbaum. And I thought, well, yeah, I'm going to go and check it out because it was the first time you and I were going to meet in person. And I went to that class, and it was just amazing to see how everybody was working together. And then, after that, you invited me to the DCC national symposium. And I think that the captioning wasn't working, called out to the community, and was like, yeah, we need to do collective access. And I had never seen that happen before. And I think it's very tied to what you were talking about, community support, because the essence of that is looking at the needs of others. Wow, why don't we do that even in meetings? You know what I mean? Why is that not just something that's normal for us to be like, wait, Ryan's here. What does he need? Tracie's here. Does she have what she needs? It's beyond just physical, what you see, right? It's very apparent. We could see that you are a power wheelchair user. But neurodivergent people, you can't necessarily see that. And so I think that that's that awareness of community support that you and I have been-- we've been talking about it for a while, but really seeing that advocacy works is tied very tied to community. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Yeah, and it takes I think, a lot of intention, too, with that, as well, too. And I think the disability community is really great about being able to have a shared understanding of each other's access needs. Even if we don't share the same disability experience. We're able to check in with each other at the beginning of meetings or the beginnings of lectures. TRACIE ALLEN: Willing to have the conversation, right? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Right, saying, hey, is everyone's access and functional needs being met right now? And if not, what can we do? TRACIE ALLEN: And that can change, right? It's like every day can change. It could be a different situation for you that morning, tougher day, easier day. So what drew you to Berkeley? And what were you hoping for as a student with a disability? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: What drew me to Berkeley was the historic activism that was so evident throughout our university's history. And obviously, the one that I most identify with is the disability rights movement, I think what was important for me to have an understanding is that even though UC Berkeley has this great history of activism and change-making, it doesn't mean that everything's perfect. TRACIE ALLEN: No. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: And it meant that there would be more work that would need to be done. Now, coming to my first day, I wasn't sure necessarily what that work was going to be like. And where it started for me was living in student housing. Now, when I moved into student housing for graduate student housing down in Emeryville, at a-- called the intersection, I did my due diligence as a disabled student. And I asked for a tour to go check out and see if everything was going to meet my access and functional needs as a disabled student, as a physically disabled student. And upon touring with a disabled lens, I noticed certain gaps, like the absence of an emergency evacuation chair. And that was particularly important at the Intersection because the housing units started on the second floor. So I wouldn't be able to evacuate on my own. And it wasn't until we had a fire alarm in our building that was not planned. For all intents and purposes, that was the real deal and that we would need to evacuate the building. Once I moved into the hallway, I immediately realized that I did not have a way out. So I was-- TRACIE ALLEN: How scary. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: It was probably the most terrifying moment outside of a hospital in my life, I'll say. And I remember just hearing the alarms blare and blare and blare and being sequestered next to the stairwell. And it wasn't just the threat to my physical safety. It was the mental aspect of seeing your peers evacuate without you, that feeling of being left behind. Luckily, it turned out that there was some construction in the building, and it tripped the fire alarm. So it wasn't a real fire. But that was a serious access failure in the most intense situation that you could think of. TRACIE ALLEN: And then how traumatizing every time you walk into that building thinking that, oh, there's a risk. Me just going in here is a risk. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: And less than 24 hours later, an undergraduate student on campus, Tricia Nguyen, who I will plug here as a Regent's and Chancellor's scholar, as well, too, experienced the exact same thing in her student housing, where she was not able to evacuate the building due to an absence of an emergency evacuation chair, where the elevators doors shut, and she couldn't evacuate. So her and her care attendant were just at the top of the stairwell, waiting to find out what would happen. TRACIE ALLEN: Man. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: So I knew that there was an issue on the campus. And because it was happening at UC Berkeley, I said, well, this is happening at UC Berkeley, the birthplace of the disability rights movement. This could be happening on any of our campuses across the system. And that was the point where I took these concerns directly to the Board of Regents. And earlier that summer, I had gotten elected as president of the UC Graduate and Professional Council, which represents over 60,000 masters, doctors, potential lawyers across the University of California system. And I shared my story with the Board, where all of the chancellors were in attendance, our former university president, Michael Drake. And it was-- you start noticing moments that began to really change things. There's a quote from Judy Heumann, that I actually used in my master's capstone, that says, "Change happens very slowly, at a glacier pace almost. And people who want to create that change are pulling all of the levers that they can. And excruciatingly slow, you'll notice that something will tip and that change will start to happen." And I felt like when I shared my story to the board and also shared Trisha's story, that was a moment where things started to change. And immediately following that, I began working with the Office of the President to create system-wide guidance to ensure that our students with disabilities-- but not just students, also staff and faculty with disabilities-- would have support systems in place on the campus to ensure their safety when it came to emergency evacuation. And my belief was that, god forbid, if there was going to be a major earthquake in San Francisco, which we do expect to happen in the next few decades, first responders might be a little preoccupied than to come to student housing to take me down a level. But it would be important that our students were not, again, left behind. So creating guidance for the campuses to implement, whether that be really enforcing emergency evacuation chairs in all of our campus buildings that are multi-storied, having individualized emergency evacuation plans where you can work together with a staff member from the Disability Access Compliance Office here at Berkeley, because you can work together sharing your lived experiences as a student, staff, or faculty member with a disability, and then having someone on staff with so much knowledge about the campus infrastructure of how these things work, you can create a plan together on where you will be and what support systems you will have available to you. But then another thing that was really important for us was to train and create what we call building emergency coordinators. And those coordinators would be responsible for their lecture hall or for their building in student housing and would be the point person during an emergency and would have access to students and would know where their students are in the event of that emergency and would be able to go assist them if it's needed. TRACIE ALLEN: So it sounds when you went to that meeting with the Regent, you felt the shift because you actually felt like they heard you. But now you see that, once you got here in Berkeley, and then you saw these changes-- because I do know that there are changes now with the emergency evacuation-- where you actually had a voice. You said, number two in disability justice is having the voice of the disability community because it's invaluable where you can partner up, which that's what I really love about all of this, is that we can partner up, and our expertise and skills combined together can enrich the system barriers that we have, may it be policies or the buildings. I mean, I know you were talking to me about just the simple thing of going to class. And say that you're late, and the door is closed, and you literally can't get in. And I just thought, how terrible, dehumanizing that you're trying to get to school to learn, and you still can't do that, because the building itself is a barrier for you. And then it also is that mental-- I keep thinking how the mental strain and challenge of, oh, man, that was just tough to even get in the room. And then you get there, and then you have to decompress. OK, I'm in the classroom and getting prepared for learning. How do you focus? It becomes more barriers and more barriers and more barriers coming in. And that's hard. That's really hard. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: It is. And I mean, I would experience that frequently at community college and at UC Davis, where I would have to show up 20 to 15 minutes early for every class just so I could scout out a student potentially walking by, or maybe I meet the faculty member early there, which actually kind of worked to my advantage because I would get to know the faculty member more when I showed up early. But it still was something that I just needed to factor in, that non-disabled students would not have to factor in, because they showed up whenever they had to show up. TRACIE ALLEN: And they to get up at the last minute, don't have to do all the preparation. Yeah, there's a lot of little things. It takes a lot. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: There's a lot of planning when you're a disabled person that you have to do, that you have to think out. I'd like to think that we use that to our advantage quite a bit because I'm able to really plan out my day hour by hour, really efficiently because I've just had to live disabled in my entire life. But that's another thing that we needed to consider. But once I came to Berkeley, finishing this story, I remember going to the Goldman School and just expecting the same thing, that I would go to GSPP 250 and not be able to get in to the door to the classroom. But what I noticed was an automatic door button. And there were kind of a lot of doors around at the Goldman School, so I was just-- I thought that was a door to the outside or accessway to the outside. But it turned out that that accessible door plate was directly to the classroom. And that was the first time that I'd ever experienced true access into the academic setting, where I didn't need any other assistance. I was able to navigate from my transportation directly into the building and directly into my seat in the classroom. TRACIE ALLEN: Wow. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: And that was, again, a new level of independence and access that I experienced here on campus. And I hope that's something that we could all create for our students here. TRACIE ALLEN: That's why it is important that faculty and staff, that we pay attention and also bring them in, draw them in, right? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Yeah. TRACIE ALLEN: Was there a moment when support from peers, faculty, or staff really changed things for you? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: One I think that I want to start with is our amazing Disability Cultural Center on campus. That was another thing that drew me to Berkeley because I knew that UC Berkeley had the only, the first and only Disability Cultural Center in the entire University of California system. Being in that Center, being with other students and staff and faculty where we all have a place to just be ourselves, I never would hesitate or feel like a burden if I needed to ask for assistance, or I needed to ask for my laptop out to complete an assignment. It was just a space that was so welcoming and that I felt completely like myself in. There was something just different and intrinsic about being in that Community Cultural Center, where we could have so many different conversations around our disability freely, beyond accommodations. TRACIE ALLEN: Right. Yeah, which brings up, when we talk about beyond accommodations here on campus, that I think that we-- I love going to the DCC. I mean, every time I go there, I meet amazing people. Everybody's friendly. Everybody's there to help each other. The sense of belonging is present in how you feel. And DCC here is definitely a shining example of that because it is that holistic approach to education. Something that I'm really reflecting on, and what I see in you is, I mean, you're an alumni. The focus for you still is advocacy work. It is about, what am I going to do beyond Berkeley that I'm going to impact the rest of this world? So I think that that's what's so inspiring about students here is that, even once you graduate, it doesn't just stop there. OK, I got my diploma. No, it's about living a life that is in pursuit of making access of education there for everyone. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: I never could have dreamed that I would be at Berkeley as a young disabled person, where I never took the SAT or the ACT because I was worried about asking for accommodations. And those were things, academic barriers that I had, that told me that I would never make it to one of the best institutions in the world, I think disabled students and people about being contributors, whether that's in academia or in the workplace or beyond. If you're physically disabled, if you're neurodivergent, you think differently than your non-disabled counterparts. And that is not a deficit. That's an asset because from my point of view, also in a public policy space, I will think of public policy problems different and solutions differently than my other non-disabled public policy professionals. And, we're able to come to probably similar solutions. But we all might think about a different community or a different outcome based off of our own lived experiences. And I think that is really one of the great assets of having a diverse student body, a diverse campus community, that we're able to all contribute differently, similarly but differently, to the problems that we face on a campus, in a community, in the world. A second story that I'd like to share about a real difference that a faculty member made in my journey here at UC Berkeley was taking a course in the City and Regional Planning department, and it was with Professor Dr. Victor Pineda, serves as the executive director of the Center for Independent Living in Berkeley. And it was the first time that I took a course, at all levels of higher education, where my faculty member was also a power wheelchair user. And that shared understanding and identity broke down all of the barriers, all of the scares that I would have asking a faculty member a question and just transformed my view as a student, as a learner in the classroom. Now I'm in a class where we have multiple wheelchair users, where we have guest lecturers who are wheelchair users. It was just amazing. It was a feeling that I never experienced before. And I experienced it here at Berkeley because we have such a deep network of disabled scholars of people across the region that we're able to tap into for their expertise and for their knowledge. TRACIE ALLEN: They were given that opportunity. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Right. I think a lot about accommodations in the classroom. I've always said that I'm very privileged to live with a physical disability. I'll say that again. I'm very privileged to live with a physical disability because I will never have to quote, unquote, "convince" anyone that I'm disabled. But I know of a lot of students who are neurodivergent, who have chronic illness or chronic pain that do. TRACIE ALLEN: Yeah, they have to prove themselves all the time, right? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: And when I think about accommodations, I know that there's some concern among faculty about changing academic standards. Rigor is something that I think we pride ourselves on here at UC and wanting to make sure that we're challenging our students, but about challenging them in a healthy way, I'll say. Those academic standards are not meant to be changed. Accommodations are about providing access to those standards so that our students can rise to the occasion and can meet your expectations in the classroom because we all want to learned something new. That's why we're here. Right. We all want it to contribute something bigger than ourselves. That's why we're here. And I think if our students are granted these opportunities to be in classrooms that traditionally, historically, they have not been in, they will see that opportunity, and they will be 100% in that. TRACIE ALLEN: It sounds like what you're saying is that faculty, just reminding them that accommodations-- there's a purpose, and the purpose is about accessing the learning. And when you have barriers like the physical buildings or the way that instructors do the pedagogy of their classes, those become those barriers. And then we're not really doing what our mission is, right? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: And additionally, as a disabled student, I would never want my faculty member to change their course just for me. I want you to teach me as though I'm one of your however many students. But also, teach me like it's going to be in the real world. TRACIE ALLEN: Right. I want to be able to have faculty-- a call to action, not just to faculty, but to staff. What would you say, in terms of community support, what is something that you think that faculty or staff, how do we have somebody try something new that would open that opportunity for better access for students with disabilities? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: One, it's integral, but also is interconnected in the ways that our entire campus community can play a role in the success of our students. You have so many different departments and individual faculty members who are always trying to do their best in the classroom. I know that. And our students are in the same boat. They're also trying to do their best in the classroom. But some days, our students, some of them, might experience chronic pain. They might have a doctor's appointment that they can't come to the class. And being able to provide access to the materials that they otherwise would have been at if they had not had a disability, I believe is all about what we're trying to do. TRACIE ALLEN: So different options. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: I think it takes a deep level of understanding, but also empathy. TRACIE ALLEN: Empathy. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: For students with disabilities. But one thing that I'll also say, too, is that, as a disabled student, I know that trust-building can go such a long way with faculty members. So even though I didn't have to, I would always make it a point to go introduce myself to the faculty member. And I would tell them, listen, I might need some certain things in my accommodations in order to fully engage and participate in your course. But I wanted to communicate that day one so that we're able to work together as a team because I'm here because I had such deep interest in your class, in the materials that you teach. And this was the course that I wanted to take this semester. And if faculty members can listen to that and understand that, that students are taking my course for a reason-- it's because you got something good to offer-- that they'll want to provide that access to that student because they want to teach as many students as possible. TRACIE ALLEN: So having so having a personal relationship. And I think that that's really what you're talking about is building trust within and among us. It's not just that you're just another number in the classroom. I think that all students, that's advice that I would say to all students, is about having that personal relationship. But it does take effort for people to work and build relationships. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: It does. And now that I think about it, I will also say that that's probably easier said than done. I think about another example, going back to the built environment and our infrastructure on campus, where many of our classrooms have disabled seating in the back. But you might not necessarily have access to the front of the classroom. It might be a very tall lecture hall where there's steps down and your wheelchair cannot. So you can't even reach your faculty member. TRACIE ALLEN: A lot of the rooms are in a way that you cannot get to where they are at the front. So maybe the one thing that comes to my mind is a faculty member, if they notice that there are students with disabilities, especially people who have a wheelchair, the one thing that they could change easily today in the classroom is to just recognize and then make that time and space and opportunity for them to actually go and meet you, to give that student that opportunity, because I imagine that you probably are thinking, well, I can't get to them. That's why it is important that faculty and staff, that we pay attention and also bring them in, draw them in, right? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Yeah. And I know, in the graduate space, we talk about mentorship a lot between faculty members and either their GSIs or GSRs, or maybe you're on a capstone course. But I think mentorship is critical across all of our different levels of the university. If a faculty member can play a mentorship role in a disabled student's experience here at Cal, I think it will directly benefit them and their experience, where they might not see themselves in a research space. But that faculty member changed that and said, no, you can be in the lab, actually. So I think just more conversations, more communication, that understanding empathy between all of the members of our campus community. TRACIE ALLEN: Ryan, I just want to thank you so much for taking the time to well, first, just to have courage to talk about your lived experience here. I cannot wait to see what you're going to be doing in the future. Is there anything that you would like to share before we end here, just any thoughts? RYAN MANRIQUEZ: I really wanted to say that higher education has changed my life completely. I never would have thought that I would be in boardrooms or in community spaces like the ones that I get privileged to be a part of today. And I hope more disabled students from across the country flock to whatever university that they want to go to because education can change lives. I am a direct result of that, and I want to see more students do that. Back to that mentorship piece, if you have a role model-- I say that with R-O-L-L, with my wheelchair-- TRACIE ALLEN: [LAUGHS] RYAN MANRIQUEZ: --then you'll be able to see that it is possible in your future. So mentorship across levels, I think, is going to be critically important for the success of our students in the future. TRACIE ALLEN: Thank you so much, Ryan. It's been amazing just to get to know you through the past couple of months. RYAN MANRIQUEZ: Thank you. And thank you for uplifting and sharing our stories across the university community. It starts by listening, and I know this podcast is going a long way to doing that. So thank you. TRACIE ALLEN: Thanks. [MUSIC PLAYING] Thank you, Ryan, for leading with lived experience and to everyone listening for the everyday decisions that build a culture of access. Show notes include UC Berkeley's emergency evacuation plan and a short video with Ryan, where he reflects on why equitable design and clear evacuation planning matter for students and staff with disabilities on campus. Finding Space was produced by me, Tracie Allen, and Research, Teaching and Learning, or RTL, with production support from Stephanie Mackley, Betsy Greer, Laura Hart, Robert Hold, and Melanie Green, and RTL Communications and Media. Special thanks to Oliver O'Reilly, vice provost, and Catherine Cronquist Browning, assistant vice provost and chief of staff for undergraduate education. Our theme song is "Golden Grass" by Blue Dot Sessions. If you have ideas for future episodes, email me. I'm at findingspace@berkeley.edu. We'll be back with a new episode next month.

Episode 6: Roll Model — with UC Berkeley alum Ryan Manriquez 

In this episode, alum, Ryan Manriquez, shares how a terrifying emergency-evacuation failure in graduate housing became a catalyst for change—prompting system-wide guidance, individualized evacuation planning, and a renewed focus on not leaving anyone behind. Ryan also highlights the role of the Disability Cultural Center, mentorship, and representation in creating real access. We discuss why accommodations don’t lower academic standards—they enable students to meet them—and how small shifts by faculty and staff signal belonging every day.

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Finding Space is brought to you by Research Teaching, and Learning (RTL) in UC Berkeley's Division of Undergraduate Education.